5) Opium and Belladonna

from by Keegan Ostrowski

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    The official first batch of CDs for The Ilusen's Fallacy.

    Limited edition of 88. Each disk, booklet, and inlay was printed, cut, and handmade by Keegan Ostrowski, and each set comes with two discs in a jewel case.

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about

This song is rather emotionally heavy. The entirety of the song focuses on when Keegan discovered his exgirlfriend was hiding an addiction to smoking opium and abusing wildflowers, thus the title coining the "classic" pair of drugs, "Opium and Belladonna".

The track is split up into three main sections. The first talking about the drugs involved, the second talking about his perspective of helplessness, and the third describing her perspective of frustration.

The song depicts the way everyone handled the emotion or circumstances corresponding to the timeline in which these events unfolded, including the viola solo, (the drug den), the second solo (throwing care to the sky and getting drunk), and a few other situations.

If you pay attention, it also recurs themes from Inaugural into their full themes.

This song incorporates themes from The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, and we do not claim ownership or originality on any of the themes besides how they are placed in my music.

lyrics

I. Substances
The Matter at Hand

A choice, that sets a rotten path, one you can't tread back, nor change where it goes, it's too much weight.
Once held, you're cradled in it's arms, life, from then, transformed. A tsundere to defy, you interrelate.
An amber full of joy. Indulgence at a risk. No one matters, as long as you get a fix.
Emotional blockage, interstellar feeling, blissful numbness that has you kneeling, poison in the form of a dried latex.

Memory fades, succumbing to sensation. A familiar feeling you want, reacquainted.
A difficult battle against your own must, your own will, but once you give in, you're at a temporary fill.

A seed, so tiny in a yield, cultivated from the same field, a toxic substance that trades your value to hallucinate.
You feel the floor under incline, the buzz of brain cells as they die, you fail to show any concern as you let your mind deteriorate.

II. Short Term Side Effects
Emmnas’s Perspective

I gazed on down, distraught, as this all took place, impossible to endure that behavior,
Impacted deeply at what I’d discovered, all I felt was a displacive failure.
Two options laid down in front of me, torn between two choices I had with you, I was confused
All the times I woke up near midnight, unsettled, and disturbed, and perturbed, challenged when I’d do all I could do.

Why was it so hard for you to see what you’d do?

You tried to create leverage, like what you’d do would reflect on who I was, like it was a part of us.
You tried to find a crack to fill, something I would deflect, I was lucky to, see through your invalid trust.
Upon my frail decision, to give you up, to cut the tie, it wasn’t something that I wished to do.
You backed me up against a wall, one that would’ve taken me, ensnared me, something that I couldn’t live up to.

Why couldn’t you see? That you damaged yourself more than you hurt me.

Why can’t you see, what you’d do to me? I couldn’t see, you tried to help me.

III. Long Term Side Effects.
Emcere’s Perspective.

Breathe. Help me. Drowning. I need…

Sensory fades, transforming to elation. A familiar feeling you need, reacquainted.
A difficult battle against your own want, your own will. As always, you give in, you're at your temporary fill.

You didn’t understand what was wrong, you are entitled to help me, I made a mistake, and I’m hurt but I demand you take me back and HELP.
I pushed you away and did this to myself while hurting the ones I loved. You persisted to help me through it yourself, but I went and ended your
Trust.

I’m alone, please, don’t go, help me through, I beg of you.

At first it was just to stay a little try, I had no idea that it’d lead to this, I’m succumbed by its hold on me, I can’t break fit.
It weakens you and it freely wrecks your life, burning all that you care about to ashes and replacing them with turbulence,
Opium and Belladonna.

It weakens you and it freely wrecks your life, melting all that you care about to resin and replacing it with turbulence,
Opium and Belladonna.

credits

from The Ilusen's Fallacy, released September 8, 2018
Guitars, harsh vocals, clean male vocals: Keegan Ostrowski
Bass: Linus Klausenitzer
Drums: Marco Minnemann
Female vocals: Sara Vanderheyden
Violin: Ryan Cho

license

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tags

about

Ilusen's Fallacy San Diego, California

7-string progressive death metal, written by multi-instrumentalist Keegan Ostrowski located in San Diego.

Music composed, mixed, and mastered by Keegan Ostrowski.

7-string guitars recorded by Keegan Ostrowski

7-string fretless bass recorded by Linus Klausenitzer

Percussion and drums recorded by Marco Minnemann

Writing started 2013

88.88 minutes
(1:28:52.52)

Demo'd 8/8/16
Released 9/8/18
... more

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